Let me tell you, everything I’ve learned, I’ve learned from helping other people.
I’ve been noticing a very interesting (and welcomed!) pattern emerging from my #postaday2011 habit — I’ve been receiving more offline comments about my blog than online, via text messages, emails, phone calls, dinners, in person, private Twitter conversations, etc. Whenever someone reaches out to me for help I do my very best to put out, whether that means I temporarily set aside my own priorities or shove off a responsibility. After all, it takes a lot of guts to admit that you need help with something and I am always honored to help when I’m somehow magically targeted.
From my experience I’ve realized that when people seek help, they are often looking for:
- Someone to actively listen without passing judgment
- Someone to help them organize their thoughts
- Someone to help them formulate an action plan
If nobody has told you this yet, know that you hold the most salient, pertinent, and relevant answers to your life’s biggest problems. Somewhere, deep inside, you control your level of happiness and satisfaction. You are able to achieve anything it is you seek because you have the human capability to create your own destiny. You don’t have to rely on someone else’s validations and opinions to affirm what you already know to be true. Your friends, your family, perhaps even your religion, won’t be able to hold a candle to what you know to be inherently true to your world. Don’t let anyone else ever tell you otherwise. I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason: whether it’s adversity, loss, love, virtue, violence, or divinity, everything that happens to us has a simultaneously cumulative latent/instantaneous effect on us. Somewhere, in a parallel universe, lies your “what if” moment, your long lost love, your hopes and dreams — all you have to do is switch your frame of mind and it can be yours.
The next time you seek help, look within yourself first. You are your own best enabler. You know what’s best for you. If and when do you seek help or solace in others, choose wisely. Look for help from people who bring out the best in you. You are whatever you put out into the universe, and strangely enough you will manifest your own destiny with every action you do (or do not) take. The keys to the kingdom are in your hands — you just need to learn to slow down, focus on yourself a bit, and trust your gut instinct. And, if you need some validation, sit back and watch this short film…I am sure you will find it inspiring.